It's Official...

I've become my mother.  In the best sense of the word, but it is shocking how many things change once that precious little bundle of joy enters your world. 

1.  It is impossible to spontaneously do ANYTHING anymore. Remember how you used to be like, "oh we are out of milk" and would just grab your keys and run to the store?  Not happening anymore. First of all, you will only go to the store when you are in dire need of something (diapers, baby Tylenol, vodka...I sort of kid on that last one).   Or when you have a list that is so damn long it's obvious how long it's been since you last went to the store. You are even out of condiments. When that time comes when there is literally nothing left to eat in your house...you'll go to the supermarket. It will take you about 15-45 minutes to pack up everything you may need "just in case" the baby has a meltdown, gets hungry, or decides now is the optimal time to have an explosive diaper.  Once that's all ready, you will get to play the game of  "I know you hate going in the car seat but please, please just this once let me buckle you in without arching your back etc.".  Once that battle is won, you pack up the car and head to Kroger. Half of the time you will forget that huge list and won't even consider going back for it.  So then you get the privilege of playing the guessing game of what you truly need to buy.  This entails going down every aisle, while pulling random colorful objects off the shelves to entertain the baby. Hopefully your baby is big enough to sit in the baby seat of the shopping cart because if you have to bring in that whole car seat...you can physically only fit like five things in that cart. You end up leaving out essential items or slowly piling stuff up around your baby until you're sure the lady in aisle 5 is calling child protective services on you. Once you finally check out, the teenage bagger will load all your groceries into a completely separate cart, which makes putting an infant car seat into it impossible.  Then you and said teenager will struggle to load all those damn bags into the cart without smothering your child.  When you arrive home, 1-4 hours later...once you debate which gets unloaded first...the milk, ice cream or the baby...you will then and only then realize all the items you forgot to get.  But there is no way in hell you're attempting that whole thing again. So you'll eat dry cereal for a week until you muster up the courage to face the store again or the always safer, faster and far less painful option...let daddy watch the baby while you take a mini vacation at Kroger.