Friday, July 31, 2015

All Sippy Cups Are Not Created Equal

As many of you know, my parenting style won't be featured in any guidance books any time soon.  I don't think I'm doing anything particularly wrong, but I have a strong feeling that many moms would highly disagree.   That's ok.   Agree to disagree?  
I cherish every single day with my child and in those few rare moments where she isn't my most favorite person in the world, I quickly go back to her days in the hospital and just like that...she's top notch again. 
 People always warn you about the toddler years and how the terrible twos will challenge you...I thought for sure, not my Harlow.   She's so sweet. And quiet. And obedient. 
And then she turned two.  It was like clockwork.  Tantrums began.  Bawling over anything and everything.  Frequently losing the ability to fetch things on her own. Disagreeing with me at every turn and a sudden independence that I wasn't quite prepared for. 
I respect a girl who knows what she wants and I fully understand how certain things are simply superior to their  generic competitors, however, there are days when I can't tell if Harlow is selective or battling OCD.  
Case and point, the Sippy cup.  Like many moms, I bought a variety of brands and styles, as the second you assume your toddler will like one type, they sure as hell will refuse it. $200 later, we settled on the Nuk Sippy.  We all know I'm not a huge fan of the color pink, so I bought a few cups that were green with pink lady bugs and a few that were blue with turtles.   At first it was smooth sailing.   
Then came the urges    
Tell me I'm not alone on this one. 
Harlow gnaws down on the plastic nipple part super hard and grunts and grinds her teeth around.  
Please, for the love of God, tell me I'm not alone on this one. 
Said urges, cause additional holes and new leakage from the cup. This is not acceptable to Miss Priss. 
She must have taken her anger out on the lady bug cups in particular, because now they just won't do. In her crying fits of rage for "Milky," I have been dumb enough to offer her the pink cup.  
What the hell was I thinking?!  
If I'm lucky enough to dodge the cup as it comes flying at my face, in return, I get to experience 5-20 minutes of pure unhappiness and frustration. (Sometimes from both of us). 
Super Nanny would tell me I'm crazy.  That if a child is really thirsty, they will drink from whatever cup is offered. That it is absolutely ridiculous that parents adhere to their child's behavior and exchange the "wrong" cup for the "right" one.  
And I would agree. However...
Some may call it laziness, but there are times when it is simply easier to give in and find that damn blue Sippy.   
Harlow has smartened up and now requests "blue Milky". She also let's me know that she wants it "heavy" which means full.  The repercussions of presenting a half full Sippy cup are dangerous.  

Other fun facts I'm quickly learning from my toddler:

She suddenly insists on wearing "big girl panties"... Over her diaper

Thomas the Train is her NĂºmero Uno, with Curious George running in at a close second. 

She agrees that big girls don't need Pacis, therefore she isn't a big girl yet. 

Time goes by at snail speed when I can't get the Apple TV to turn on quick enough 

The "quick wash" cycle actually takes 10 years when her Blankie is being washed. 

"Poo poo" also means "pee pee"

Coloring with her consists of her telling me where I can sit, what color I can use and where on the paper I'm allowed to draw.  Any alterations to this will result in fury. 

Harlow has two bedrooms. "Harlow's room" and "our room".  When I've asked her why she doesn't sleep in her bed, she says "because I sleep with you".  

Any article of clothing that has polka dots on it, resembles Minnie Mouse.  She loves to sleep in her Minnie pjs. 

Rain or shine.  Winter or summer.  Appropriate or not.  The red Hunter boots are 9 out of 10 times, the ONLY accepted footwear.  

Any food that she doesn't like is considered "too spicy".  

Her baby dolls MUST have real milk.   Pretending isn't acceptable and water is even worse.  And as you guessed it, her dolls only like "blue milky" too. 

When I do finally reprimand her and threaten to put her in the corner, she bats her eyes (on command) and compliments me.  Sometimes they are odd compliments.  The other day she said, "mommy, I like your arm. It's really pretty". 



I'm so screwed.  

Wednesday, July 29, 2015

I will try and fix you

Loss is experienced in so many different ways.  No experience is like another and no two people feel the same.   Many friends of mine have experienced the loss of babies.  I simply cannot imagine.  I still have heart wrenching flashbacks and thoughts of what could have been, but those are all they are.  Flashbacks and thoughts. They aren't my reality or daily struggle.   I believe I am a very sympathetic and empathetic person. I always try to put myself in others' shoes and help find a common ground.  I know this is going to sound so awful and selfish, but the loss of a child is just not something I can allow my mind to imagine. In dealing with my friends and their children passing, I automatically get this gut wrenching feeling and have major anxiety.  I know that most people share in those feelings, but mine still stem for the events of a year ago.  I still cannot hear certain songs without bawling like a baby. I feel so helpless in my attempts to comfort those who have experienced something that I was fortunate enough to dodge. I would never compare my journey to those who have lost a child, but I still know the agony and pure terror of believing you are watching your baby slip away. My heart breaks for anyone who has to continue on without their precious little one, as I know the dark moments I had, when I was told that would most likely be my outcome.   I pray for peace in their hearts.  I hope for brighter days, where they can smile and put one foot in front of the other.  I send love and energy as they begin this dreadful journey.  I hold my Harlow even tighter when things like this happen.   I have this sense of guilt as I sometimes feel like because so many of my own prayers were used and answered, that perhaps they no longer work for others.  I know that sounds silly, but I still say them and hope they are heard.  It's easy to get lost in the shuffle of day to day chaos and forget how quickly life can change and how suddenly people can be taken away.  
Sorry for this super depressing entry,  just have lots on my mind and needed to get it out.